I created 'HOW LONG' spontaneously one night early 2026. I was feeling I was losing touch with producing, so wanted to see if I still had it in me.

 

TERRYSYNTH had sent me a soundscape in 2025, but I didn’t know how to incorporate it into the album because it was so slow and atmospheric. But when I heard the 'WOLF SOUNDS' by SHUBHAM SHARMA, I knew what to do.

 

I Incorporated both beats and added a trap essence and Native aura to represent my mixed heritage. The title ‘HOW LONG’ is about people asking how far along I am with my pregnancy, but also that we don’t know how long we have left on this plane, so it’s time to embrace it for what it is.

 

I met TRUMPCARD after I was asked to perform at WAVIO RECORD’S ‘THE ROTATION’. This was after taking a break from performing, so I was nervous about what I could bring to the table, with the additional pressure of being 7 months pregnant. Someone suggested we should make a track together, so I sent him the beat a few days later as I could envision him on it.

 

At the time I had only recorded the harmony, and once TRUMPCARD sent me the stems back, I was blown away. The only reference I gave him was the explanation behind the title, and asked him to talk about his experience with depression and how he overcame it. 

 

I combined all of these feelings and emotions into a hook, exploring concepts of heartbreak, the feeling of abandonment, mental health struggles, self-sabotage/isolation and racial and religious discrimination from the world around you, whist still trying to stay positive and move through it all.

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TRUMPCARD’s views-

 

Section 1: The Loss & The Ego

Your indifference is killing me; This loss is weighing heavy on a man like me. Why are you plucking the flowers (breaking hearts), girl, while youth is fleeting away? People are staring at me, and I’m roaring/putting on a brave face, but your gaze is fixed elsewhere, and that’s where I’m drowning.

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This part is about the contrast between internal pain and external ego. He’s “roaring” (bukkda) to keep up appearances, but he’s actually helpless because she doesn’t care.

 

 

Section 2: The Fragility of Dreams

Maybe I am “unripe” (fragile and unstable), but I need a solid answer. I’ve crucified my own dreams; I’m just hoping they survive the sacrifice. I tried to wake up (face reality), but the chaos only increased. Perhaps ashes are all that suit toys made of clay.

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This is very poetic and dark. The “clay toys” (mitti de khidone) metaphor suggests that the relationship or his life feels fragile and destined to turn to dust/ash.

 

 

Section 3: The Hustle & The Distance

That’s why I’ve stopped worrying and thrown myself into my work. Come with me (or “let’s go”). This distance you’ve created—keep it, guard it. But my heart is going to ask some tough questions very soon.

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This is the “turning point.” He’s trying to distract himself with the “hustle” (kam nu), but he knows he hasn’t actually moved on.

 

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Section 4: The Outro (The Identity)

Sleep... I’ve given up on sleep. My letters remain anonymous or unaddressed. I’m infamous now, and the lines of my destiny have been erased today.

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A very moody finish. It suggests insomnia and a loss of identity. He feels his “destiny” (lakeeran) is no longer in his control.

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